I am actually writing this blog in response to one of my friend's blog. A lot of the things he mentioned in his blog really made me think (he always gets me to think). In his blog he said this:
"The thought at the beginnning of the meeting was about idleness. If Satan is going to get those of us who are strong in the gospel, he will use idleness. The way he will start is by getting us to be lax in our scripture study, and in our prayers. If we do slow down our study and our prayers, so to speak, we will lose a greater portion of the spirit."
It really got me thinking about how lazy I have been. Since I have been out here I haven't exactly been the prime example of what to do while at college...actually I wouldn't even go far as to say I am an example. I have been really lazy and panicky (if that is even a word). I have been putting aside my scripture reading, somewhat schoolwork, praying with real intent, resting, and even eating somewhat. I have been sitting here in idleness for a long time waiting until I started to get a hang of things before I was going to plan for my scripture readings. While I have been reading my scriptures for class and to keep up a promise I made years ago I haven't really tried to read and understand what they are telling me. While I was at a devotional someone spoke about when you put aside reading your scriptures you are putting aside Christ. That just sounds so wrong! I want to get better at setting apart a certain time in the day to read my scriptures and not just to get an A in my religion class, but to really read them to understand them on my own turfs. These were just a few thoughts that I had when I was reading my friend's blog.
I started thinking about how the Lord has been there for me these past two weeks. My friend, the one I quoted from his blog, does not know this but while I have been out here he has been helping me out a great deal. Let me try to explain this! I have gotten to know my friend to the point where whenever the Lord wants to tell me something through my thoughts He uses my friend. Let me give you an example of what I am trying to explain because I know that it doesn't make any sense from what I have written. On my first day or second day (I can't remember) I was having a hard time making friends. Actually I hadn't made any! I was walking around the gardens when this guy walked right past me. It was as if my friend (the one from the blog...keep up with me because I'm not putting out names) was there through my thoughts. I had the thought (exactly as my friend would say it) to go and talk to that guy. I didn't go at first, but then the thought came again, so I went up to that guy and asked him if he was lost...he wasn't. We started walking around campus and talking. We walked around campus at least three times! His name was very similiar to that of my friend (so in my head I laugh at that saying stuff like "oh so that's why you wanted me to talk to him") actually his name only changes by two letter...kindof freaky right? Anyways, we were walking and talking and joking around for about two hours. One of his friends called him and she joined us. We went over to Dominos (because she worked there) and we all chipped in and bought some pizza. We walked back to campus and ate some pizza on the grass. After about two more hours we all went our seperate ways. I had made a friend! The next day I still wasn't making any friends (we have a thing out here where the freshmen meet together in little groups and get to know each other and about the school). I still hadn't clicked with anyone in my group! I finally decided to make a better attempt to make friends. I succeeded! After that the friend I met around the gardens I saw very little of (because we just haven't run into each other much). I came to the point where I made many friends (I'm over at their houses a lot!). We have so much fun (but this is where the distraction I'm talking about comes into play because I love being around them and I enjoy it to the point where my time is gone). That friend who I quoted has been doing stuff like that ever since I've been out here.
The Lord has been looking out for me out here! I have been trying to save money to the point where I was practically living on Ramen noodles. I have lost weight to the point where one of my guy friends noticed (you know its obvious when a guy notices weight loss). I think it scared one of my roommates because one sunday morning (this past sunday) I decided to eat it for breakfast. She made me french toast that morning. Not only that but that same roommate wrote me out a schedule earlier this week because I have been having difficulty getting organized and planning out my daily schoolwork. She has been like a mother to me lately to help me get on my feet again, but she has also been a friend to me being there for me and hanging out with me! A couple of days ago things became so hard that I accidentally knocked over 8 of my perscribed pills (that was a rough estimate) and I just cried. I went into her room and just let everything out! She gave the idea that I should get another priesthood blessing (a couple of days ago I asked my roommate to ask someone to give me a priesthood blessing and I got one...that's the simplified version). I told her that I wasn't sure if I should get another one because I just got one two days beforehand. I thought about it and felt a sense of peace about it, so I went with that decision. That same day I went shopping with my roommate (she helped me out some) then a couple of our FHE leaders (she advised them because she said that they would be better because they were over us) showed up and gave me another blessing that was bore a second witness to the first blessing. Afterwards one of the guys stayed behind and to give me tips and even helped me out with some of my homework. I am so grateful for the priesthood!
I could go on forever telling stories of the marvelous things that the Lord has done for me while I have been out here, but considering time I will spare them for another day. I am very grateful for the things that He has done for me. I am grateful that He didn't give up on me even when I had given up on myself. I am grateful that He provided me with many friends who show me the way and uplift and inspire me. I am striving to do better while I am out here and I know that my Heavenly Father is with me each of the way! I want to deeply thank my friends for all the things they have done for me no matter how great or small they always help and mean something to me! I hope that when the time comes for me to do the same I will be able to help them out in whatever way it may be!
I know that my Heavenly Father loves me! I know that He is watching over me and taking care of me (even when I'm not eating right or sleeping...).