Tuesday, April 27, 2010


As a Daughter of God I have the right to tell my story. As a child of God, you have the right to choose whether to read this or not; this being called agency, something you and I fought for in the preexistence. You know that old saying "you never know what you have until it's gone"? My older sister is mentally ill and recently came out of the hospital. Every night my mom leaves the house, sometimes with my little sister, and stays at her house. After my mom, and sometimes my little sister, leaves things not only get quiet but they also get very lonely. I was laying in my bed one of those nights when it was just me and realize something. I realized just how much I missed my mom and my little sister. I realized just how much I love my family. I don't think I have ever felt such gratitude towards my Savior for my family ever in my entire life. Even though they are only gone for a few hours each night to care for my older sister I miss them terribly!

A couple of times I became a little scared being alone at night in a house. Last night was one of them. Immediately I pulled out my cell phone and started texting one of my friends and I started to listen to a talk by John Bytheway. When I asked my friend what he was doing he told me that he was listening to John Bytheway. I laughed and told him that I was too. We continued to text for a little bit and then we stopped. I felt so grateful just to text my friend! I still feel grateful for that. I prayed to my Heavenly Father and thanked Him for blessing me with family and friends, but this time I really meant it!

I heard a story about some people in concentration camps and someone asked "what can we be grateful for?" and someone wise said "we can be grateful for the fleas." Fleas? How can someone be grateful for fleas? The fleas kept the guards away from the building where they were studying the scriptures.

There are stories in the Book of Mormon filled with stories about how groups of people were about to perish and yet the Lord would spare their lives, give them food, and even deliever them out of the hands of their enemies. What blessings they received!

I am so grateful for everything the Lord has done for me! I am grateful for my family and friends. I'm grateful for my enemies. I am so grateful for all that my Savior blessed me with.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Stand up for virtue

As a Daughter of God I have the right to tell my story. As a child of God, you have the right to choose whether to read this or not; this being called agency, something you and I fought for in the preexistence. In my opinion virtue means much more than just waiting to "create" or even committing adultry, no it also means keeping your thoughts, your actions, your clothes modest, your language morally clean, and staying away from porn. A couple of years ago I met this guy (I will withhold his name for his sake) who I just don't feel any respect for. To me he seems like a guy that will do anything (and I mean anything) to gain popularity and to get somebody to laugh. I remember one day he was looking at his phone and laughing with his friends. He showed me what was on his phone and it was one of the most horrific thing I can possibly think of that I have ever seen. I refuse to go into any details. I was absolutely mortified and disgusted by this. I went and told a teacher what had happened and the teacher didn't do much, actually all he did was tell that guy to stop it. What I had witness kept running through my mind again and again. I prayed so many times for it to get out of my head and the Lord heard and answered my prayers to the point that even to today I can no longer remember what I had seen, but I can remember what had happened. I soon became angry with that guy and was scared that he would do something like that again. I was only concerned with protecting myself from this ever happening again that I went up to him and told him that we were going to have a conference with my parents, his parents, and the headmaster about what he had done. I meant it too, I remember asking my dad to talk to him. He knew that I wasn't kidding too! He was really scared of the talk that he was about to have with me, my parents, his parents, the headmaster, and himself. He asked me to not do that. It got to the point that someone else even asked me to call it off. I starting thinking about it and came up with a better solution :) I told him that I would call it off if he would promise me that he would never do that again and if he would be kind to me (I threw that one in when I was talking to him, so he would be nicer...pretty clever right) and told him that if he broke that promise that we would have that conversation with our parents and the headmaster. He agreed to it and it was called off. He stayed clear from me for a while after that. Even to this day that promise is still in tact.

Speak up for virtue! If you feel someone is threatening your virtue, say something! Don't ever place yourself in a situation where someone will take away your morality away from you in anyway! Never, never allow your morality to be threatened! If anything like this ever happens to you, tell someone you trust like a friend, a leader, the bishop, your parents, just tell someone.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Enduring to the end

As a Daughter of God I have the right to tell my story. As a child of God, you have the right to choose whether to read this or not; this being called agency, something you and I fought for in the preexistence. Yesterday I went to my second track meet. My little sister was suppose to go to one of her soccer games, but it was cancelled, so she and my mom were able to attend my track meet. She is so sweet! She not only offered me to borrow her running shoes, but she also went all the way out to the car to get them for me. So she got them for me and I tried them on and they were a lot lighter than shoes. Anyways, while we were waiting for my event which was running the 200 meters we were watching them run the 1 mile (at least I think that was the one miler...). The 1 mile means running around the track 4 times. There was this one girl from another team that was competing in this event and I remembered watching her from the last meet. Anyways, so the guy called out "on your marks, get set" bang and they were off. All the runners then took off. Four laps later they all finish, all but one. She had another lap to go, but she ran that last lap anyways. Listen with your spiritual ears for a minute, she was the last person to finish, but instead of quiting, she finished the race. I thought that was really cool!
I had been really nervous for my event and said like 3 or 4 prayers asking for my Heavenly Father's help (because I needed it and I knew that I couldn't run without Him). Eventually it became my turn to run. I went up there and signed in. I started talking to the others who were competing in that event (which calmed me down a little bit). Soon enough it was my turn to run, so I lined up into position (I was in lane 1) and ran after the gun went off. I was in 7th place at this time. I noticed that the only girl behind me was catching up with me. I was doing great until that last 100 meters when my fears and doubts started returning. I realized where that thought was coming from and said to myself in my head "not today satan!" and you know what, after I did that I was able to finish the race (and I came in 7th place). As I was talk to my coach I also found out that I had beaten my previous time. The coach also told me that if one of the girls that was going to run in the 200 meters for regions moved up to the 400 meters I would be in the top 2 and be able to compete in the regions game for the 200 meters (so no one is deceived, what he meant was that there would be only 2 people interested in that event and since I would be what was left I would have the chance to compete)...but still the fact that I might go to regions was a great thought.
Its amazing how the Lord answers my prayers and how He is always there for me. God really does answer prayers and He wants to bless us, we just have to excercise just a little bit of faith and ask Him for the things that we need. He will answer our prayers according to His will, in His way, and on His time are we blessed.
"Fear does not come from God." (I can't exactly remember who said this, I want to say it was either John Bytheway or Joseph Smith, but I could be wrong). If fear doesn't come from God, then surely it comes from satan, the one whose plan is to spiritually destroy all righteousness. I say that as long as people excercise faith and humility and go to God they can conquer satan and his attacks through fear and doubt.

Being Bold

As a Daughter of God I have the right to tell my story. As a child of God, you have the right to choose whether to read this or not; this being called agency, something you and I fought for in the preexistence. There were times in my life when I was bold and there were also times in my life where I wasn't and I missed a chance. I realize that I am not always a bold person, so please don't think of me as a hypocrite. Here are some of my favorite moments where I was bold.
My second year of eight grade (yes, my second year...I failed eight grade on purpose; I just gave up and chose to fail, so I didn't fail because I'm not capable, but thats not the point of this story) is when I started going to private schools. There was this girl (I will withhold her name for her sake) who loved to pick on me (or at least she would try). Anyways I remember she wanted to spread a nasty untruthful rumor about me. She told me that the only way she wouldn't spread around this lie was if I helped her out with school. I told her to go ahead and tell everyone, but I know and God knows thats its not true and thats all who needs to know (the words that I wrote probably weren't a direct quote of what I said but its pretty close). You should have seen her face! She was so stunned and if my memory doesn't fail I think her mouth fell open. Anyways when she realized that she couldn't harm me (notice what I said...usually a bully's motive is to try and destroy someones spirit, but if you don't let it bother you, their attacks have no value or no effect on you...just a side note there). She then began begging me to help her out with school and I remember I told her I would help her though (and I did or at least I tried).
This one was just this past summer at efy. It was testimony meeting and I chose to get up and bear my testimony after a huge discussion I held with myself in my head. I remember I got a lot of feedback on my testimony. Towards the end of efy my company gathered in some room and we all said our goodbyes and exchanged our emails and stuff like that. This guy that I didn't talk to at all came up to me and said told me that he was gonna go on a mission (when I was talking to him it seemed as if my testimony had changed his mind about missions and he was like 16ish I think...). Another guy told me to not loose my strong testimony about two, three, four times...IDK. Anyways then came the last day of efy (you know...pick up day) and as I was waking up one of my roomates (I had to only share a room with only two other girls, until someone else moved in which made three others, while everyone else had 6 girls staying in there dorms...just a sidenote there) kept popping her head in my room to see if I was up. I ended up walking over to put in my contacts and walked back in my room and found out why she kept popping her head in my room...she gave me a stuffed animal with a card. ( I really loved having her as a roommate because she was wild but sweet...I remember that I fell asleep on the couch because I have this thing about sleeping with lights on, I just can't do that, and she put a towel under the door to stop the light from waking me up, but since I fell asleep on the couch it woke me up and I started complaining about it and later realized that she had tried to help me...oops!) Anyways back to the story. Now my roommate, well, lets just say that I don't think shes exactly strong in the church (I think she goes, but has issues...well its not my place to say anyways) and she and her friend thanked me and told me what a pleasure it was to be around me and stuff like that (I think she and that other person really meant it...I still have that card).
I will not state when or where this next story took place...well at least not on my buzz. This guy I know (for his sake I will withhold his name) who just did not like Joseph Smith at all. He would constantly trash him, or so it seemed to me, everytime I was near (because he knew I belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints). Most days I would just take it and sometimes I would politely ask him to cut it out. I remember one time it really got to me and (I am convinced that this came from the Lord) I turned to him and said "so and so I respect your religion why won't you respect mine" (that was pretty much an exact quote). He couldn't respond to that (you could tell that he would have said something, but nothing came to mind). Anyways I wound up teaching him about Joseph Smith. I was able to teach him that Joseph Smith loved God and the Bible and how he followed God and the restoration (at least I think I taught him the restoration). I knew that day that he felt my spirit. He started looking stuff up about the church throught the website that I led him to and he even was curious about whether nonmembers could go to byu (that was the school that I had my heart set on and he knew that a lot of members went there). I remember that I would help him out with every math test. I made notes for him to help him out on tests to show him what people in my church were like. Everytime he trashed the missionaries I would always ask that he would at least show some respect to them (he is the type of person that would slam the door in their faces). I even challenged him to challenge the missionaries the next time they came to his door and start talking about Christ and the Bible...he hasn't done that. I would love to sit, or stand, here today and tell you that he has been converted, but he hasn't. At least I think he respects us and our religion a little bit more.
Oh my gosh this memory of mine was just so incredible. I met this guy at efy 2006. We became such great, fast friends that people started to think that we were either dating or related. After efy our friendship continued. We talked for years (and we are communicating still today, as much as I feel we should at this time...let me finish the story for you to understand why I want limited communication right now). I remember he asked me a question (I'm actually embarrassed to tell you the question he asked me, but nevertheless, here it goes...) "Do you think that guys who go on missions are hot?" I responded to him that I did and told him about a friend of mine who woke up his mom to go to church and how I just thought it was so cool. Anyways he talked to me a little less and a little less until we just stopped talking altogether for about a year (IDK why, he just did). I encouraged him to go on a mission from time to time. Last november I sent him an email and I hadn't sent him anything in a long time before then. As it turns out, he is now on his mission...now the question is, did I influence his decision by being bold?
To finish this post off, I just wanted to tell anyone who reads this that I know just how much power one voice can have on many.

My Story

As a Daughter of God I have the right to tell my story. As a child of God, you have the right to choose whether to read this or not; this being called agency, something you and I fought for in the preexistence. Recently I began to listen to the little lies satan spat out, for example: I'm not a daughter of God, I cannot return home to my Heavenly Father, trying is a waste of time...etc. These are all false! Since I cannot honestly say that I stand here, I sit here today, telling those who have excercised their agency to read my buzz, to tell you that I know I am a Daughter of God. I know that Heavenly Father loves me (whether I realize it or not), I know that the Book of Mormon is true, I know that the atonement exists and I know that it works. A scripture that I really like is found in 2 Nephi 26: 28 "Behold, hath the Lord commanded any that they should not partake of his goodness? Behold I say unto you, Nay: but all men are privileged the one like unto the other, and none are forbidden." I wish that when I was at Hill Cumorah Pageant I would have known this because I remember there was a lady who specifically asked if she thought we were better than others, oh if only I had known this scripture.
This scripture is so powerful just by word, Alma 60:22 "Yea, will ye sit in idleness while ye are surrounded with thousands of those, yea, and tens of thousands, who do also sit in idleness, while there are thousands round about in the borders of the land who are fallen by the sword, yea, wounded and bleeding?" When I read this, I think about today's world. What happens to a car when it comes to a stop at a red light? It idles. That car has great potential to go the distance, so to speak, and so it is with me. I have the potential for greatness, but when I idle, I don't go anywhere. Now think about the people who don't have the truth. A lot of them are addicted to porn, swear, do drugs...the list is endless really! They are fallen by a sword of destruction and they are bleeding and wounded and need our help. Now look at that scripture again (to avoid hypocrisy I will merely just write this as if I am writing this to myself because honestly, I idle a lot). Will I sit in idleness while there are many who also sit in idleness and are spiritually suffering? Am I really just going to sit here, in my comfy chair, and do nothing? I think that scripture is inspires me to bear my testimony, to go out of my comfort zone, to bear others burdens, to open my mouth and procalim this gospel because there are many who are fallen by the sword. Food for thought I suppose.